Seeing as how every year I say "oh, I'm not going to make any resolutions this year", but then I secretly do (a secret from who, you ask?? YOU!). And then I secretly break them. No, I secretly dig them a grave and secretly bury them! Who knew I was so secretive!
Well, this year I'm pretty sure I can keep all of them or....break some bad habits. Either way, I won't feel like a total loser.
Now for my list:
1. Gain weight
2. Consume as many Diet Cokes in one day as humanly possible
3. Excuse my grumpiness, no matter what day of the month it is
4. Become more of the problem, not the solution, to Global Warming. My hair care alone could be at fault. I'm just saying...
5. Recognize the answers to everyone else's problems but my own
6. Be more bossy
7. Be disgustingly self-involved
8. Worry a little bit more
9. Assume everyone already knows how much I love them and act accordingly
10. Keep my spiritual feet planted firmly in the mud they currently reside in....and not grow a bit
11. Realize I'm the perfect wife and mother
12. Go ahead and write that parenting/marriage book to help all of the other struggling people in the world
13. Stop making lists
14. Never use coupons
15. Understand that kindness is overrated
......And there you have it!
Here's hoping for a big fat failure.....according to my list!
